"Him 2"

2005-08-19T06:39:05Z

She looks up at the night sky. She sees the stars, in the same position as she remembered them. She closes her eyes and lets the memory take control...

Tears are rolling down her face, but in the memory her smile is the widest it could ever be. It was the August sky, sitting in the middle of the road. It was this very spot where so many nights have taken place, so many lovely memories. Lay down, beautiful. Lay down on the hard ground next to him. Hear him breahing, watch his chest expand. Listen to him speak to you. The moon is so bright tonight.. so bright tonight. Both sets of brown eyes drift across the sky, left to right and back to eachother. The awkward feeling takes place. You feel it in your lungs, in your chest and in your stomach. You feel the dizziness. The feeling he used to give you, you haven't felt this in a while. You never knew what it meant, but he was always right in front of you and you never took avantage of what you had. You see him, such a fucking beautiful person, standing before you with arms wide open. He embraces you like no other, like he really fucking cares about you. Now that you're soaked with tears, get up off of the ground. Walk to that very place. On the way think of what you'll do. Recite what you'll say. He won't be there. You know it. Do it anyways. Those strong, fill hands, skinny fingers and soft fingertips, perfect wrists and pretty arms. Curly brown hair and subtle brown eyes. Embraces and kisses like you would not believe. You're finally there. Look up at the sky. Still no moon. Did you recite what you were going to say? Yes. "I've been typing this with my eyes closed, tears overflowing these eyes. I feel like I'm about to drown. But I can feel you with me constantly. Seeing you away from me is pure hell and torment but its good to see you smile again, to know you're happy. Even without me in your life. I'm typing this with my eyes closed, still crying, missing you. I remember the last night I was with you. You kissed me like you had never done before, and I really felt like I meant something to you. You held me tighter and closer and I don't think I've ever felt happier. You walked me home, spoke like the friends we were. Walked passed our spot, the opening in the bushes just to see the sky and the lake. Come to my house, time for our goodbyes. You know I love you. You know how much you mean to me. I won't bother with telling you, I'm not supposed to. You kiss the top of my head and say good bye. You never say good bye. You kissed the top of my head, and we parted. But I watched as you walked away, I watched you as you left me. The night was so still, so dead." Scream it to the sky. You've let it out for the millionth time, but it will never go away. You can't bring yourself to talk to him, to bring it up. It's yesterday's news and no one wants to linger. He fucking holds grudges and your sick of it, but you have no choice. It's not like you to give in, it's not like you to give up. You're a fucking fighter and I have never rseen you fail. But this time, you've let it go. I am so disappointed in you. You fucking disgust me sometimes. Your face is stained with tears and your ready to carve them into your skin so that they're permanent. You're so in tune with self mutilation that it has become a part of you. You don't care anymore. All because you cared about him. You never realized it before, but he's beautiful. Beautiful in every way. You want to contain it. You want to praise it. You want it to be great. You want it. You want it. And that request is just too great. You love him. And he's lost. And that's that.

She looks up at the night sky. She sees the stars, in the same position as she remembered them. She closes her eyes and lets the memory take control...

Tears are rolling down her face, but in the memory her smile is the widest it could ever be. It was the August sky, sitting in the middle of the road. It was this very spot where so many nights have taken place, so many lovely memories. Lay down, beautiful. Lay down on the hard ground next to him. Hear him breahing, waycj jis chest expand. Listen to him speak to you. The moon is so bright tonight.. si bright tonight. Both sets of brown eyes drift across the sky, left to right and back to eachother. The awkward feeling takes place. You feel it in your lungs, in your chest and in your stomach. You feel the dizziness. The gfeeling he used to give you, you haven't felt this in a while. You never knew what it meant, but he was always right in front of you and you never took avantage of what you had. You see him, such a fucking beautiful person, standing before you with arms wide open. He embraces you like no other, like he really fucking cares about you. Now that you're soaked with tears, get upp off of the ground. Walk to that very place. On the way think of what you'll do. Recite what you'll say. He won't be there. You know it. Do it anyways. Those strong, fill hands, skinny fingers and soft fingertips, perfect wrists and pretty arms. Cir;y brown hair and subtle brown eyes. Embraces and kisses like you would not believe. You're finally there. Look up at the sky. Still no moon. Did you recite what you weere going to say? Yes. "O've been typing this with my eyes closed, teras overflowing these eyes. I feel like I'm about to drown/ But i can feel you with me constantly. seeing you away from me is pure hell and torment but its good to see you smile again, to know youre happy. Even without me in your life. Im typing this with my eyes closed, still crying, mussing you. I remember the last night i was with you. you kissed me like you had never done before, and i really felt like i meant something to you. you held me tighter and closer and i dont think ive ever felt happier. you walked me home, spoke like the friendsd we were. walked passed out spot, the opening in the bushes just to see the sky and the lake. come to my house, time for our goodbyes. you know i love you. you know how much you mean to me. i wont bother in telling you, i'm not supposed to. you kiss the top of my head and say good bye. you never say good bye. you kissed the top of my head, and we parted. but i watched as you waljed away, i watched you as oyu left me." YOuve let it out for the millionth time, but it will never go away,. you cant bring yourself to talk to him, to bring it up. its yesterdays news and no one wants to linger. He fucking holds grudges and your sick of it, but you have no choice. its not like you to give it, its not like you to give up. your a fucking fighter and I have neberseen you fail. but this time., you've let it go. i am so disappointed in you. you fucking disgust me sometimes. your face is stained with tears and your ready to carve them into your skin so that theyre permanent. your so in tune with self mutilation that it has become a part of you. you dont care anymore. all because you cared abouthim. you never realizrf iy before, but hes beautiful. beautiful in every way. you want to contain it. you want to praise it. you want it to be great. you want it. you want it. nit that request is just too great. you love him. and that's that.

^^^^ written with my eyes closed. spelling errors left and right.

Locked.

2005-01-30T23:04:51Z

Where the hell is your key?

p.s. it means find a key on the google search, and maybe i'll let you come in =o)

<3 Heathurrr

:: Invisibility ::

jestenmach @ 2007-01-04T19:38:00

"Him 2"

Locked.